Since my last post my life has changed somewhat. Largely this is due to my abysmal exam grades. This really put a lot into perspective from me. Namely if I don’t work now I wont have the chance too later and to be honest, its not too bad. I cant deny its a considerable amount of extra stress to get revising but,when you get there it means you can just let go. You don’t have to worry about well anything because all that matters in your life is whatever your working on in that moment. You just sit there work. I would be lying if I were to say that I enjoy it but Its not anywhere as bad as I thought revising would be.
However. You need music. For me, this includes a band called Blackwaters who have about 7 songs and I’m slowly falling in love with each and every one of them. Its punk rock brought to the modern age…But not as scary… Also on the playlist is KYLE. For those who don’t know him, Kyle is a rapper but hes not. Yes, on a first listen he sounds like every other new-age rapper but this is a rapper who doesn’t show off at all… He’s a rapper who; doesn’t care about getting broke just to pretend to have a Lamborghini ( He has a second hand Dodge Challenger with a dent), Doesn’t particularly care about owning shoes that cost more then the price of a baby snow leopard ( His favourite shoes to wear are Vans) and he isn’t scared to show his hurt over a girl. Hes just so cool.
Oh! Just to keep you all informed on the band situation…there isn’t one…At the moment at least but who knows whats going to happen in the future. So while were on the topic of my social life (Sort of) I feel like I’m beginning to get one. As in I feel that I can talk in my school group now and honestly, its the best feeling to be at a point in my life were I feel on top of things.
So sorry this one was a long time coming but revision is taking priority at the moment so I will try to post whenever I can.Thank you for taking the time to read this though. 🙂
So…that once a week thing worked pretty well, huh?
A lot has happened since my last post. For one it snowed which I seemed to be the only one in the country who didn’t like this. I’m not going to pretend I did not enjoy it, and relish the day off it brought with it, but on a whole, its horrible stuff.
It is the physical embodiment of the word”cold”. And not just a quick blast of cold that you would expect from a winter breeze, no. This is a cold that lingers on your clothes turning them sodden. It even seems to cling to your skin, freezing you in a vice like grip.Then it turns to sludge. The single most disgusting thing that comes out of British weather.
However once all the snow had cleared,it made way for the warm feeling of Christmas. Despite the fact that as I grow older some of the sparkle and colour of Christmas seems to fade away, I still admit that it truly is my favourite season. Excuse my cringe but there’s something about being around you people you love and hold dearest that really does make you feel warm inside. There’s something magical about it. (Dont worry, I feel just as sick writing that as you probably are reading it.)
Then after that, new years eve. I don’t remember much of new years eve but im fairly sure I enjoyed it…mostly…I think…
As usual, thank you for reading, I appologise for not being as regulated with these as I should be…
For starters I would like to apologise for not posting another blog-post. To be fully honest I just haven’t felt like It was something I should be doing. Kind of like It’s above me. But I guess everyone starts somewhere and if I don’t start I’l get nowhere. I’l really try to keep to a (sort of) weekly schedule from here on out. 🙂
So anyway, I went to Cornwall recently. Its always weird travelling to different parts of the UK for me because it makes me realise how miserable my city is. For example the day before posting this blog, A bus driver attempted to start a row with me over 5p. I don’t mean “sorry sir, you cant get on” said in a sarcastic tone, I mean “Oi! What do you think your doing?!? Something* idiot….” I ended up having to get off the bus to go and get 5p from my house to then walk back to the bus stop only to be greeted by the exact same driver on the exact same bus who didn’t utter a word.
Now imagine my surprise when just a drive away is a place where people you don’t know smile at you. It is the most heart warming and intensely creepy thing I have ever experienced. Not only that, but they have bookshops. Not like your Waterstone’s and WHSmith’s where everything is new and glossy, No. This was something different… It was warm and cosy. It was owned by one woman. I cant remember her name but she was unbelievably kind. As I sat in one of the plush sofas squeezed in amongst the shelves I realised that I’ve never had this. I’ve never been inside a shop were your not forced to make a choice of buy or exit but here buying something is a choice and an exit is unfortunate. I got thinking, why we didn’t have such a place in my town? I then realised its not the shops we don’t have, It’s the people. This as a woman who enjoyed books. She told me of how all she did as a kid was read and that’s its all she does now. That when she reads anything shes going through seems a million miles away for a few short hours. I can relate to that. She had a love for books. Not money. And I think my city really needs more people like her.
I didn’t actually end up buying anything from the shop…But that didn’t seem to matter to her. We need more of that…
Sorry. That got a bit deep. on a lighter note, I’m in a band. What I bring to a band I have yet to discover as the other members are ridiculously cool and talented and I’m just a bit…Nah…Despite this I am looking forward to the experience and It’s going to be a lot of fun to get to be up on stage with such awesome guys.Were called “A Bad Romance” if anyone’s interested…I’l let you know how it goes.
So that’s it…Blog over…sorry I rambled about Cornish bookstores, although I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless. Thank you for reading. 🙂
*I’m fairly sure my mum reads my blogs so I’m not gonna swear in case it gets me in shi-….erm…trouble…in case i get in trouble
So…That’s my first term of my last year. How? Last month I was at a different school having water fights with fruit shoot bottles, Giggling at the back of french class as me and my friend looked up rude words in the dictionaries and trying as hard as we can to annoy the older boys. But now that is me. Now those impossibly mature not-really-nearly adults that seemed to radiate wisdom and culture are who I must be now. I mean im not. I’m fairly sure the only thing I radiate is a gloomy depression or an annoyingly positive buzz(I have been told before both generate an equal amount of sympathy). But i still feel like I should be trying to emulate those older boys I remember being so damn cool. That I should be having the same effortless charm they had.But i don’t. And you know what? I don’t think I will be. Theres loads of people who are in my year that can naturally do that. So im gonna be awkward me. For my last year, for the year after that and for every year onward. People might not like that and that’s gonna be ok…But im not going to change who i am to fit who they want me to be.
On a more light note I think im begging to understand how to draw. Now I am by no means saying im an artist. far from it. I’m well aware that my ‘Art’ could easily get mistaken for “Hello” in Mandarin, but i can see it looks slightly less like Mandarin which im not going to lie, I am proud of.
Speaking of things im proud of, I’ve started going to the gym and im going to end it there to avoid future cringe but its going alright.
So as I said before these blogs are just gonna be whatever I feel like writing so sorry if this one was a bit heavy. Thank you for reading tho 🙂
Today has been weird. Like I kind of realised I’ve stopped living. I just kind of float from day to day without doing anything that I can look back on and think “Wow, wasn’t that fun!”. Its all the same. I wake up and lay in bed past the alarm. I rush out the house. I rush to my mates car. We rush to the bus stop. Bus rushes to school. I rush through school. I rush home. And repeat. Theirs slight ups and downs but nothing seems new anymore. Its like I’ve already been here before…
This feeling is illustrated perfectly in Childish Gambino’s (aka smoothest man alive) “Clapping for the wrong reasons”. He really shows what it means to just be there…
So on a positive I’m gonna go and see Mae Martin in a few weeks!!!!! YESSSSS!!!! I’m a massive comedy fan and this is gonna be my first time seeing a proper stand up!!!
Again this is an awful way to end to a blog but there ya go 🙂
So… I’m doing a blog.
I have absolutely no idea what a blog contains exactly but i reckon its at least worth a go. I’m going to be honest if you’re looking for a deep,witty yet somehow charming perspective on life with just a hint of morbidly, relatable humour, Sorry. Il try my best but just keep expectations to a minimum…Oh, And my S.P.A.G (Spelling,Punctuation And Grammar) is truly awful but my best 🙂
So im getting back into grime. Help. I am the opposite of the target audience for grime. Grime is for Teenagers who stand about in the park at an unreasonable hour at night, dressed head to toe in the same Adidas tracksuits and North Face windbreakers,shouting “BRRRAAAPPPP!!!” After every few bars,closely followed by a chorus of “oiii”‘s…. I am not this…the comparrason ends at teenager.Yet i still can rap half of Chipmunks “Rap vs Grime” off by heart, complete with a somewhat un-PC Caribbean accent…
For those unfamiliar to grime music it is probably best described as a mash-up of Garage,Dance and (more closelsy) UK rap. Thresult is brutal. It is honeslty the most honest and raw thing ive ever heard. To be fully honest the lyrics sometimes leave alot to be desired but this is allways made up for by the passion the artists rap with.
So…i guess that ends the first blog… Probably not the bestway to finnish a blof but there you go… Thanks for reading. 🙂
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